How do you know??

We in the adoption community often get asked the question, "how did you know it was your child?," or "did you know right away, it was your child?" This of course is referring to when you get a referral "child's file." It's hard to answer. For many, they fell that they knew the second they saw the picture, for other, it took some time and for some, even not until they actually met. It is OK no matter how it goes. I think it's more your gutt. If your doing a Special Needs program, it should be about the medical conditions and if your able to care for the child. But I guess that sometimes goes out the window as did with our son Felix. His conditions were not on our acceptance list. When we saw his face, we knew. I was nervous and did think for a minute after we accepted if I'd be able to deal with his conditions. We know now, thank goodness we accepted. He is a pefect fit into our family. As for our daughter that we know await, I knew the second I saw her face. I can't even remember who told me about her. I belong to so many yahoo groups that I can't keep track. Someone told me about a little girl 18 months with a cleft lip/palate. I called the agency and that was it. Done deal. Someone on a site that I go to for information said she actually turned down our daughters referral but fell in love with her. She said that they were looking for cleft lip only and were placed with their daughter 3 weeks later. I asked her if she was the one that referred me to my agency but she never responded back. I truley felt it was an angel guiding me to our little girl. I write about all this today because I was staring at our latest updated picture of our daughter and feel like I've know it was her forever. I stare deeply into those dark puppy like eyes and know it's her we've been waiting for. Having said that, I think it's ok to not know it is your child right away. Sometimes you feel it in different ways then just looking at a picture or the sign comes from somewhere else. It's up to you to recognize it.