Adopting

I haven't posted in a while as there really is nothing to talk about, so I thought. Any one who has gone through an adoption process international or domestic, would know that it's difficult to stay positive and/or think talk about anything other then the next phase.

I thought that the wait through the Chinese New Year was going to be much more difficult, knowing that the CCAA shuts down for 2 weeks. Well one week technically, but they are short staffed until the New Year is over. We're one week into CNY and I feel very much at peace with the wait. Can't tell you the cause for the sudden equanimity. Who knows.

I thought I'd mention a topic that I often get approach with. It's the fact that people tell me I'm a great roll model for others whom should consider adoption and/or special needs children adoption. I appreciate the fact that someone sees me as this, that being said, I would never talk someone into adoption. And who are these people that should consider adoption? Is it people whom are infertile, impregnating through IVF, older couples? I often advocate within the adoption community for children or agencies. Never outside of it. I will tell anyone who asks me, adopting a child IS NOT FOR EVERYONE! People are surprised of my response, assuming I will respond with much more avidity. As for adopting a child with a medical condition(s), you really need to soul search here. Here's the deal, you have to ask yourself if you are ready for:

Months, days, years of uncertainty? Disappointment? Highs and low? A medical condition your not prepared to handle after accepting the file? Significant developmental/physical delays? Paperwork, dossiers, appointments for medical check ups, police clearance reports, FBI finger prints, USCIS clearances, scrutiny of a social worker for days, months or years? Keeping in mind that depending how long you are to wait, you might need to renew all and more of the above. Finally, the cost? It's not for the faint of heart. You need to know going into the uncertainty, there will be a long road ahead. Whether your starting with paperwork and no referral "child," as we did with Felix and Sami, whom was originally Penny. Or starting with a referral, as with Penny now. Is still just a long road. I thought it would be easier knowing the child that exists at the end of this road, but it's not.

We in the adoption community write these posts for the people that come in to the yahoo groups to visit and inquire about adoption. So for some of the readers, this post will not apply. Sorry to have wasted your time. Good Night